Ode to NFL Nicknames

by John Delach

Before we close the book on the 2013 season I’d like to give a shout out,

to players past and present whose nicknames set them apart.

Here’s to the friends, foes, heroes, fools, villains and sad sacks.


Here’s to Spatz Moore, Crazy Legs Hirsh and Night Train Lane,

Concrete Chuck Bednarik, Iron Mike Ditka and Mean Joe Greene.

To Too Tall Jones, Broadway Joe, Deacon Jones, the Kansas Comet and Sweetness,

Big Ben, the Bus, the Tank, PAT, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.

Here’s to the Galloping Ghost, Prime Time and the Touchdown Maker,

Slingin’ Sammy Baugh, the Refrigerator, the Freezer and the Kitchen.

To Y.A., T.O., R.C., J.D., O.J., C.C., J.P.P., D.D.T., L.T. R.G.3, and T.D.

Fatso, Pork Chop, Pudge, Big Daddy, Dump Truck, and the Pillsbury Throwboy.


Here’s to Bullet Bob, the Blonde Bomber, Burner, Big Game and Bambi,

the Golden Boy, the Gunslinger, the Hammer and the Throwin Samoan.

To Dr. Death, Diesel, He Hate Me, Mad Duck and Mad Stork,

Matty Ice, Little Joe, RevisIsland, the Sheriff, Tom Terrific, and Easy E.


Here’s to Megatron, Hotel, House, Mercury, Lights Out and Long Gone,

Mongo, Moose, the Inconvenient Truth, Playmaker and the Nigerian Nightmare.

To the Gravedigger, the Assassin, Hacksaw, and the Minister of Defense,

White Shoes, Rocket, Red Rifle, Uptown, Anytime and the A-Train.


Here’s to Thunder and Lightning, the Crunch Bunch, Hogs and Posse,

Steel Curtain, Purple People Eaters, the Smurfs and Well Dressed Amani Toomer.

To Bad Moon, Wildman, the Tasmanian Devil and Smash and Bash,

Flash 80, Joe Cool, Ocho Cinco, Snake and Touchdown Tommy McDonald.


Great handles, a toast to all, how dull the game would be without you.